Gintama quotes

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Gintama (manga, 2003)

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Kamui: I want to soak my soul in your blood.

Gintama (TV, 2006)

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Gintoki Sakata: Oh crap! Jump comes out today! I forgot, this week Jump comes out on Saturday. ... This might be a good chance to give it up. Reading Jump at my age... But men are always boys at heart until they die.
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Isao Kondo: We, the Shinsengumi, belong in battle.
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Kotaro Katsura: It's not Zura. It's Captain Katsura, dattebayo!
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Gintoki Sakata: Come on, I'm not carrying anything metal. Is it responding to my iron will?
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Shinpachi Shimura: I can't! I can't do it! I'd be glad if I can do it with a cute girl like her... But I'm still a boy and this time slot is anime time for children. We were already demoted from golden hour. If the PTA sends in a flood of complaints, the show will be canceled!
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Matsudaira: He's not her boyfriend! I'll never acknowledge a frivolous man like him!
Hijikata: Shut up! I don't acknowledge you as police chief!
Okita: Hijikata, I'll never acknowledge you as vice-chief of the Shinsengumi!
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Zenzo: It's the Jump double issue.
Gintoki: Jump double issue. Eh? Jump double issue?
Zenzo: Jump double issue?
Gintoki: Good grief. There's only one left...
Zenzo: What should we do?
Gintoki: I've already been to seven or eight convenience stores already. Everyone's free during the holiday season, so they are all sold out.
Zenzo: Yeah? Well, I've been to ten convenience stores.
Gintoki: Oh, if I include this one, I've actually been to 15 stores.
Zenzo: Well, my little boy, Hiroshi really wants Jump. Hiroshi is my son and only 5 years old.
Gintoki: My mom really wants it, too. She's sick. I wonder if she'll see it through the year... In fact, I'm sure she won't.
Zenzo: Well, Hiroshi is also going to die.
Gintoki: Hiroshi is going to die?
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Gintoki Sakata: Even if you lose your memory, you still retain it in your heart. You never lose the memories in your head, they are still deeply entrenched in your heart. That's what I believe.
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Ane: What's the big deal about getting your butt groped? Do you know why there are two halves to your butt? It's so that you won't mind if someone touches one half.
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Kagura: Where's Gin-chan? Is Gin-chan still asleep? Shall I wake him up?
Shinpachi: No, never mind. Gin-san's in kanashibari.
Kagura: Kanashibari? What is kanashibari?
Shinpachi: It's a ghost paralysis. You're awake, but your body can't move. It's a very convenient state for the animators.
Kagura: Convenient?
Shinpachi: Seems all the anime staff are taking a trip to Kinugawa Hot Spa, so they were talking about creating a 30-minute "Gin-san Meets Ghost Paralysis" episode.
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Okita: Die, Hijikata.
Hijikata: Die, Okita.
Okita: Die, Okita. Oops, I mean Hijikata.
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Kotaro Katsura: I'm not Lupin, I'm Zura. Oops, I mean Katsura.
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Kagura: Sounds like Rocky.
Gintoki: She's playing a Rocky-ish theme.
Kagura: It's similar, but...
Gintoki: It's the stuff adults worry about, you know, like getting into trouble if you use the real theme. But why Rocky?!
Gengai: Just hearing it motivates you.
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Kagura: Kintama!
Shinpachi: Kagura-chan, girls shouldn't say that word.
Kagura: Okay then, how about golden ball?
Shinpachi: That's not good either.
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Hata-ลji: I make a rare appearance and this is how I get treated? I might as well transfer over to "D.Gray-man".
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Szef: I always thought there was something uneven between your appearance and working ability! You act like you can easily handle all of your cases! But why are you so useless?
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Kotaro Katsura: It's not rap, it's Katsurap, yo.
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Isao Kondo: We were probably blending rap and rock to sing for peace on Earth.
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Tลyako: Perhaps an enemy stronger than anything you have ever faced will appear. You can't survive without this ultimate technique. ... In addition, if this anime is released as a fighting game, it'll be too plain if it doesn't have an ultimate technique. Think about the business aspect. Don't you know how hard a time Bandai's had?
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Shinpachi: Gin-san, nurses are really amazing, aren't they?
Gintoki: For example, take a woman who's a 7... Put her in a nurse's uniform and she becomes a 10.
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Tae Shimura: The most dangerous moment in hunting is the moment you've captured your prey. The bigger the prey, the more you let your guard down. Go read "Hunter x Hunter" volume 3, before you try and take us on, old hags.
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Gintoki Sakata: I've been reading Jump for twenty years. So I'll teach you about friendship, diligence and victory.
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Member of Shinsengumi: That sword is a Kikuichimonji RX-78! It has a built-in digital music player with a maximum playing time of 124 hours!
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Azumi: If I don't do something, I'll go crazy. I feel like I'm going to turn into a love monster!
Shinpachi: Well, you already are a monster, I guess.
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Gintoki Sakata: When are they going to run the next Hanger x Hanger? Keeping me in suspense like that! They say "we'll be right back".
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Toshiro Hijikata: If there's something stuck to the bowl... you know how you unconsciously aim at it to shoot it off? We'll use that psychology and make it so they'll aim into the urinal.
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Gintoki: I don't wanna do any training. It's such a pain.
Shinpachi: He just said something a JUMP main character would never say! He doesn't have a shred of ambition!
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Sagaru Yamazaki: How am I supposed to hit on a girl with this hair? I can't play anything beyond a side role in Fist of the North Star.
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Gintoki Sakata: Wanna know the only way to survive when caught in a spiderweb? You eat off the spider.
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Kagura: Might as well skip the effort and reuse footage for the movie itself. Toss in a few new scenes and you'll fool them all.
Shinpachi: That won't work!
Gintoki: Really? Most of Sunrise's movies are recompilations.
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Toshiro Hijikata: If you can't guard a castle with this lot, it's a lost cause. But the strongest castle will fall without a fight if it's collapsing from the inside.
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Elizabeth: Man, look at you all whining. That's why you're One Piece Quarter. Actually, it took four years to make 1/4 the amount. So if you want to be number one, you'll have to spend sixteen years preparing.
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Tsukuyo: Hinowa asked me to teach Seita how to swim. Anyway, I didn't know what to expect from a pool, but it seems to be just like Yoshiwara. Men and women enjoying themselves without any clothes on.
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Kyลซbee Yagyลซ: Jugem Jugem Shit-Tossing the Life of Shin-chan's Two-Day-Old Underwear Balmung Fezalion Issac Schneider 1/3 True Love 2/3 Hangnail Anxiety Betrayal Knows My Name Or Does It Really Ignore Calls Squid Dogfish Halibut Trout-Cod Dogfish This Is a Different Dogfish, I'm Talking About The Dogfish Shark Kaluga Angler Ray Yuuteimiyaoukimukou Pepepepepepepepepepepepe All's Well That Ends Well Runny Diarrhea.
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Shinpachi: Uh, Gin? What was that about? How could you screw up the end of the opening sequence?
Gintoki: Don't blame me. There's bound to be a mishap when you do the same thing 23 times in a row.
Kagura: I thought the opening was reused every time.
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Shinpachi: Tama may look like an adult, but she was created a short while ago, so she should get one?
Tama: Yes, it says on Wikipedia that I was born on August 16th, 2007.
Shinpachi: What's that? Wikipedia exists in this world?
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Tae Shimura: Father, it's been a while. I have something to tell you today. I think it's time to begin. I will become the character I was created to be. It's time to restore the Kodokan Dojo you left us, Father. Sorry to make you wait 260 episodes.
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Hajime Obi: The name's Obi Hajime! If that's a pain to say, call me Obi-One!
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Gintoki Sakata: Men can get by with knowledge of the Sengoku era alone! Before that, it was just mostly-gorillas running around with spears in hand.

Quotes found: 46