Quotes tagged with "funny" (newest), page 2

Yurine: Curses and whatnot, it's not scientific. How could they exist...
Nanami: How dare you say that when I've experienced it! If that's the case, then why is it that from this morning, I've been bitten by a dog, stepped on dog poop, fell down the stairs and forgot my homework?!
Yurine: Wouldn't that be because you were careless...

Shampoo: We stake Ranma for this match. Оkау?
Akane: Want me to throw in the panda too?

Lum's Father: To win, you have to catch Lum within ten days and touch her horns!
Ataru: To touch her horns, I'll have to touch her body...

Tetsushige Tokura: I was six years old when in a memorable summer I found out about hooligan comics. I dreamed of going to the high school full of delinquents where fights would be on the agenda, but... no matter how much I searched, I couldn't find one!

Palace: He just said something or other about "Saiyans." So I was about to suggest that he ask a vegetable grocer.

Sangatsu Sumire: Right now, this is testing how much I love Yukino-kun. It's alright. That's something made by the person I like, so no matter the smell, it'll definitely taste good. Look, in this spoon, it's a soup so sticky you'd think it's brown sugar. It's spreading a special smell that pierces right through your nose and reaches your brain. It's dancing on the tip of your tongue. This refreshing and delicious... Whoa, it's nasty!

Carol: Too bad we lost at volleyball.
Misuzu: There was no way a team with you and me on it could win.

Tomo: Don't underestimate me! I once stayed up until 11:30!
Junichiro: That's all? I've stayed up until midnight before.
Tomo: Midnight?! That's the next day!

Patches: Go on, follow your damn grace to the Erdtree or wherever you like.
Aseo: Bro!! You're the best kind of trash there is, brother Patches... Whenever I see trash from now on, I'll think of you! Promise...!!

Melina: What is your name?
Aseo: Y'know, I just realized I have no idea.
Melina: May I suggest one? The Tarnished are also known as Asebito... so Aseo it is.

Jorge: One battle had come to an end. However, as long as people live, they must continue to fight against something. And no one can forfeit his own fight.
Koenma: Jorge, what are you talking about with such a straight face?
Jorge: The narration!

Student: I hate violence! I'm a follower of Gandhi!
Akira: I don't give a damn if it's "Gandhi" or "candy"! I don't like your face, so it's time for some homemade plastic surgery!

Botan: Koenma-sama is finally going to remove his pacifier. And when he does... Oh no! I made such a fuss about it, but I don't even know what it means in the least!

Kurama: To think that he would fall into the trap on his own!
Hiei: He truly is a fool.
Genkai: No, he's a fool and an idiot.

Mr. Cat: Students of mine are getting married before me! There is no happier thing for a teacher than this!

Arpon: I'm going places, Paifu. You're merely in the way! I'll be the king of fights at Batwing Ridge Elementary Night School!
Paifu: Aren'tcha setting your sights a little low?
José: There's only 11 of us...

Kai: Something smells good. It's fluffy like marshmallows. Or a cat's belly? No... These are breasts! How indecent!!

Sanji: I'll polish them off in 10 seconds! Do you have any problem with that?!
Luffy: Yeah! It'll only take three seconds if I help!
Sanji: Only a seven second difference! Why can't you wait?!

Sanji: Why's the gorilla growing out of there?!
Briscola: You think so?! Then why don't you teach me how a gorilla should be... growing out of you?!

Jack: Talk about this in public, and I'll beat you to death.
Kai: You don't have to threaten him like that. We have the army and police behind us... And if they ever knew you spread around this information, you'd probably be captured and simply disappear.
Keith: You just said the exact same thing with more words.

Duck: Miss Freya is what's wonderful. It makes me wish I could become this wonderful. But that would–
Uzura: Never happen, zura.
Duck: What? Really?
Uzura: Really, zura.
Duck: Not at all?
Uzura: Not a chance, zura!
Duck: Wait, who are you?!

Lilie: I just happened to be following Pike, and I just happened to see her meet up with the wonderful Mytho, and then when I just happened to keep following them, they went off to a place where there was absolutely nobody around. Well? Want to just happen to go see?

Murao Jumpei: I got distracted by her panties and followed her here...

Sanji: We must stop him for now! Or the Flower Capital will be in chaos!
Nami: What were you doing at such a serious time?

Kuwabara: You really are one despicable guy! For feeling around Miyuki's breasts and stuff! What were you planning to do if he was really a woman?
Yusuke: Dummy! In that case, I would have just been glad to have done it, you know?

Botan: Even if he couldn't hear your voice, if you share the same thoughts, your feelings would get through! What you felt must have gotten across to him!
Yusuke: To Kuwabara?! Don't say such a disgusting thing!

Urameshi Yusuke: Yama-sama, huh? I doubt I could beat him in a fight... No, hold on! Before he conks me, I'll surprise him with a head-butt! Then, while he's stunned, I'll slide around behind him, and blind him! After which, if I can squeeze his balls, it'd be perfect!

Narrator: Urameshi Yusuke, age 14. He was supposed to have been the hero of this story, but... he seems to have suddenly died!

Oolong: I've got a bad feeling about where this is going. I'm getting goose bumps.
Bulma: You don't get goose bumps, those must be pig bumps.

Malen: You're one of the ballet students...
Duck: Well, I'm really bad at drawing pictures.
Malen: That's because you're in ballet.
Duck: I'm bad at ballet too, though.

Duck: Wow, it's so pretty.
Lilie: Totally unlike Duck.
Pike: Oh, she got depressed.
Lilie: Oh, no, did she really get depressed? How cute!

Dutch: I don't believe it. My head's still attached. Even my shades are okay. Amen Hallelujah peanut butter.

Ena: Chikuwa, I have a treat for youuu! C'mere. It's sausage.
Nadeshiko: Oh, he came out!!
Ena: Nadeshiko-chan, hold this.
Nadeshiko: Huh?
Ena: Now run!!
Nadeshiko: Huh? Huh?! Okay!!
(Nadeshiko runs, Chikuwa right behind her)
Ena: It's survival of the fittest, Nadeshiko-chan.

Amy: For our next activity, let's search that mysterious house on Block 2!
George: You mean the place next door to Doc Agasa's?
Mitch: Rumor has it that it's haunted!
Conan: Nooo! That's my house!

Minami Toba: Rum goes better with hot cocoa than you'd think.

Meguire: Hey, why are we telling him the details of this case?
Wilder: Sorry, force of habit...

Revy: Bao was steaming like a tea kettle. Said we better cover him for the mess or else he won't let us back in and he'll weld our assholes shut.
Dutch: Assholes, huh? Teardrop in my eye.

Mr. Cat: All right, quiet now. If you do not quiet down, I will have you marry me.

Ryu: It's all my fault for being so damn weak... Faust!
Faust: How can I help you, Ryu?
Ryu: Faust?
Faust: Faust's spirit, to be precise.
Ren: He's dead, that's all.
Horohoro: Don't tell me this still surprises you?

Rimi: So... you ended up double-booking for that night?
Tae: They said it's a job. I can't really back out... I'm sorry. I promised you guys I'd play at the festival too.
Saaya: How can they schedule something without even asking you? What are you gonna do?
Tae: I want to do both!
Saaya: How?
Tae: I'll... clone myself!