Quotes tagged with "funny" (newest), page 10

Kyūbee Yagyū: Jugem Jugem Shit-Tossing the Life of Shin-chan's Two-Day-Old Underwear Balmung Fezalion Issac Schneider 1/3 True Love 2/3 Hangnail Anxiety Betrayal Knows My Name Or Does It Really Ignore Calls Squid Dogfish Halibut Trout-Cod Dogfish This Is a Different Dogfish, I'm Talking About The Dogfish Shark Kaluga Angler Ray Yuuteimiyaoukimukou Pepepepepepepepepepepepe All's Well That Ends Well Runny Diarrhea.

Miyabi: For example, Kisaragi is admiring exhibits in a certain exhibition. The worker seems to be taking down a drawing, but somehow he didn't show any signs of movement. Finding it strange, you go closer to have a look. But, that's not a person, but a drawing on the wall. On closer inspection, the visitors around you are also trompe-l'œil. Coming to your senses, you realize that you're the only person there. Scared, Kisaragi wants to leave the exhibition.
Miki: But, even the exit is a trompe-l'œil!

Ryōko Asuka: Sensei... Kanzaki, Himekawa, Natsume, Shiroyama, Furuichi, Oga, Kunieda, Omori, Tanimura and Hanazawa are absent today because they have a stomach ache. I dunno anything else.

Shippō: Kagome will forgive you!
Inuyasha: What're you saying?! You sound like it's all my fault!
Shippō: It is your fault! Don't you still suspect Kagome!? Kagome did indeed protect Koga and helped him escape. Koga is your enemy. And she was kidnapped by him and suffered! Yet she helped him! That's right, Kagome's the one who suffered most at Koga's hands. So why did she take his side? Inuyasha... Do you think that maybe Kagome really did fall in love with Koga!
Inuyasha: Don't ask me! If you're gonna try to reason with me get your facts straight first!

Miroku: This is a fine palm. You'll live a long life and have many children. ... How about it? Won't you have one of my children?

Inuyasha: She chose to go home herself! She said, "I'm going back home, stupid!"
Kaede: Inuyasha... Even your imitation of her is stupid.

Inuyasha: That cocky bastard! Calling me a "mutt"!
Shippō: I don't blame him for getting upset at being called a "mutt". But he sure looks like one.

Hitsugaya: Kuchiki and Kuchiki aren't here.
Ikkaku: Can you refer to them by first names, sir? You're confusing us.

Japan: They say Italian tanks can advance sixty kilometers a week on the battlefield, but after spotting English troops, they can retreat sixty kilometers in a single day.

China: What's your name?
Japan: Hello, China-of-where-the-sun-falls. I am Japan-of-whence-the-sun-rises.
China: You're pretty rude!

Komatsu: N-No way... The legendary chef... Setsuno-sama...
Setsuno: Hey, now. There's no need to attach "sama". Call me Setsunon.
Komatsu: S-She has such strong friendly affinity. No, I can't talk like I'm classmates with a Human National Treasure...
Setsuno: Who're classmates?! Don't act so familiar!

Zonge: It's been a while since I've been to a city.
Henchmen: Yes, it's been quite a long time.
Henchmen: Uh, this is our first time coming to a city.
Zonge: I've gone to plenty in RPGs.

Ichigo: How many sets of a hundred pushups are you gonna make me do?!
Kūgo: That was only your fourteenth set. ... Why don't you do one more set to match your name?
Ichigo: You had to say that! I hate those kinds of puns!
Kūgo: Liar. I know you wear a T-shirt that says "15" on it.

Kūgo: Ever fantasize about being inside a game?
Ichigo: What're you talking about?
Kūgo: Admit it. Every kid's thought about it. Nothing to be embarrassed about.
Ichigo: I can't say I never thought about it, but...
Kūgo: Is that so? I've never wanted to, not even once.

Master Roshi: A couple billion Zeni...?! Even if I went to a strip club everyday, I wonder just how many years it would take to use it all up...

Konata Izumi: My dad, when he went to deliver his script after an all-nighter, got on an early train, overslept all the way to the final stop, then the train made a U-turn, and before he knew it, he had overslept again. He went back and forth many times. He eventually woke up closer and closer to the destination station, but he would always sleep past it by a very close margin... He was so tired that he just wanted to come home and sleep, but he couldn't manage to make his way home. And in the end, when he woke up with a start, he couldn't figure out which direction he was heading at the time.

Konata: I went to Asakusa the other day.
Kagami: Oh? When did you go?
Konata: Trains in the winter make you drowsy, you know?
Kagami: She slept past her destination?!
Tsukasa: Wait... But isn't that in the opposite direction?
Konata: Apparently, I slept too long, so it doubled back from the final stop, and I slept past my station again. And when I came to, it was Asakusa.

Konata: Oh, wait, I'm being paged. Hold on. ... He scolded me for talking too long on the phone.
Kagami: Oh, sorry. I thought your house was rather laid-back with that stuff. But is it actually pretty strict?
Konata: No, we're in the middle of a fighter-game match.

Miyuki Takara: Come to think of it, when I went to an amusement park the other day, I had thought I was lining up for one of the rides, when I actually was in line for the restroom.

Kotaro Katsura: I'm not Lupin, I'm Zura. Oops, I mean Katsura.

Kagami: There's been more and more spam lately. It's a pain.
Konata: Oh, you should change your text address to something that isn't too obvious. I changed mine too.
Kagami: Something that isn't obvious? Like what?
Konata: My address is iluvgirlsinglasses in English characters. I would have preferred something like "maid", but addresses like maid-san and miko-san are so popular that...

Shippō: How can you stand there looking so blank?! Kagome is a beauty! So she may already have been eaten up!
Inuyasha: So... Tell me what's pretty about Kagome?
Myōga: I've been thinking this from before... but I think your perception of beauty is a little off.
Shippō: Aghhh! No wonder you look and dress so weird!
Myōga: I agree... A red outfit is a bit troubling. I think you should dress with a little more refinement.

Myōga: According to rumors, those two brothers devour pretty girls immediately!
Shippō: Is that true?! What'll we do? Does that mean Kagome has already...
Inuyasha: Stupid! What's pretty about Kagome?
Shippō: What?! Are you totally blind?!
Myōga: Yes, I think she's very pretty, too.
Shippō: I'll bet she's already been eaten! It's all my fault!
Myōga: "Pretty woman, short life." What a wise saying.

Konata Izumi: I heard that this was something that really happened... Someone who works at a certain video software wholesaler finished work for that day, and got on a bus late at night like he usually does. His house was towards the end of the bus route. And so, as he was riding the bus, other passengers started leaving one by one, and he ended up as the only passenger left. The driver mistakenly thought that there was nobody left on the bus... And, can you believe it? He started to sing, in a loud voice, Danzen! Futari wa _______ Cure!

Komatsu: Something's there... Z-Zombie-san?
Zonge: It's not Zombie, it's Zonge-sama!
[...]
Komatsu: Good job making it out of there alive. Or are you really a zombie...?

Konata: Well, even though it's vacation, I'm going to see our teacher almost every day anyway.
Kagami: Why? You have summer classes or something?
Konata: We form parties in our net game and stuff. Our teacher is a wiz and I'm a tank, so when we pair up and I pull stuff, it's pretty good in terms of both xp and money. Though I'm always the busy one, and all our teacher does is click on one of the AoE skills. The other day, I pulled a ton of mobs only to find our teacher had fallen asleep at the keyboard, and it took me all day to earn my death penalty back...

Konata Izumi: There isn't much difference in appearance when you gain or lose a kilogram or two... Why does she look so ecstatic or depressed with a matter of a few kilograms? This is why girls are so...

Kagami: S'up? How's your exam studies going?
Konata: I was just cleaning up my room right now.

Kagami: Come to think of it, Konata, you hardly forget stuff like textbooks.
Konata: I'm pretty reliable about things like that. I leave all the textbooks in the classroom in advance.

Tsukasa: That, and don't forget the sound of the spinning drills! It's so scary!
Konata: But boys might like dentists and stuff, then.
Tsukasa: Why?
Konata: I mean, they say that a drill is like a guy's romantic ideal. I hear they're all about dueling robots that use drills as weapons!

Konata Izumi: I haven't seen that guy around for a while... Yeah. He was a soldier-type character, but he wanted to raise his combat skills, and he left saying he was going to train in an area with a lot of monsters... And he hasn't come back since. I heard he's camping out in the underground nest. But I wonder if he's all right, acting all hermit-like? Everyone's getting pretty worried.

Konata Izumi: I may look like this, but I have about a hundred friends, and my social and bargaining skills are pretty high, and I join a party every night. With my allies, I work to bring back the glimmer in crystals to prevent the world from falling to ruin, and rescue the kidnapped princess...

Shinigami: Since I'm wearing a mask, Justin can't read my lips, can he? Can you repeat what I say from now on, please?
Spirit: Why do I have to do something so troublesome? It's fine if he takes the earphones off, right?
Shinigami: Okay! Repeat after me!

Excalibur: Number 75: Excalibur's birthday is to be celebrated grandly.
Hiro: When's your birthday?
Excalibur: Everyday!

Mjolnir Marie: I'm... going to marry the toilet. Don't you see? The toilet will accept anything I do!

Takigawa Hōshō: It would seem that the source of the curse was not the spirits of the rokubu, after all.
Shibuya Kazuya: It's Okobu-sama.
Taniyama Mai: How did you know?
Shibuya Kazuya: Because my brain works differently than yours.

Takigawa Hōshō: This camera has had it, hasn't it?
Shibuya Kazuya: Oh, that's okay. It's insured.
Taniyama Mai: Oh, it is? Before, when you told me to be your assistant instead of paying you back for the camera I broke, did that just mean that you simply wanted some more help?
Shibuya Kazuya: You've gotten a little smarter, haven't you?

Taniyama Mai: Not only are you good looking, but you're very smart.
Shibuya Kazuya: Do you really think I'm good looking?
Taniyama Mai: Aren't you? Everyone was making a fuss over it.
Shibuya Kazuya: Hm... You don't have bad taste.

Endō Shōji: It would be cowardly to run away from it like this, right, Satō Koichi!
Satō Koichi: Huh?
Endō Shōji: Nothing. I'm talking to myself.
Satō Koichi: What do you mean? After calling a person by his full name.

Kōji Yoshida: I'm A-OK with taking on the challenge of making you a super mangaka! ... That's right, like the Super Saiyan of mangaka.