Quotes tagged with "funny" (best), page 4

Turtle Hermit: Shall I take a look at her?
Son Gohan: Can you help her, Turtle Hermit?
Turtle Hermit: I'll give her CPR!

Kagura: Sounds like Rocky.
Gintoki: She's playing a Rocky-ish theme.
Kagura: It's similar, but...
Gintoki: It's the stuff adults worry about, you know, like getting into trouble if you use the real theme. But why Rocky?!
Gengai: Just hearing it motivates you.

Hachiman Hikigaya: Well, worst case, I get serious. When I get serious, groveling and even boot licking is no problem.

Dende: Um, if we think in the grand scheme of things, all five Saiyans here could be said to have righteous hearts, I think.
Buu: Huh? Even Vegeta?
Vegeta: You're one to talk!

Bulma: And who are these two?
Vegeta: Th-This is Lord Bills, and...
Whis: My name is Whis.
Bulma: People you know? Hey, I'm Bulma. I'm Vegeta's beautiful wife.
Beerus & Whis: Hello, Bulma.
Bulma: Well, they're certainly more polite than the people you usually hang around. But they don't look like they're from Earth. Aliens... You're aliens!

Mutta Nanba: First, you see the big guy over there? He's athletic, with plenty of muscle, as you can see. He likes to act cool and play the tough guy. However... His cell phone wallpaper is a cat.

Kotaro Katsura: It's not Zura. It's Captain Katsura, dattebayo!

Shippo: Now that's more like the Inuyasha I know!
Inuyasha: Whaddya mean?!
Shippo: Inuyasha deep in thought just isn't Inuyasha!
Myōga: He's right! Don't do something you're not used to.

Hachiman Hikigaya: Hey! I'm really grown up! I grumble, I tell filthy lies, I do underhanded things...

Olivier Poplin: Damn it's hard to get a man's clothes off, and there's no reward either.

Sagaru Yamazaki: How am I supposed to hit on a girl with this hair? I can't play anything beyond a side role in Fist of the North Star.

Jaken: I want to shrink away every time we're attacked.
Rin: If you shrink any more, you'll disappear, Master Jaken.

Hachiman Hikigaya: Well, they say the kanji for "people" is two people supporting each other. But did you ever notice one side is leaning on the other? I believe the acceptance of sacrificing someone is the whole idea behind "people".

Narrator: These two are on the same team as Hinata and... Well, they're pretty minor characters, so that's about it.

Yang Wen-li: Alcohol is humanity's friend. Can I abandon a friend?

Miroku: On the way over here I thought of a strategy to keep the demon from choosing you all as brides. The demon only chooses single girls. In that case... Miss? Will you have my baby? Then the demon won't want you!

Goku: Do you know about the Super Saiyan God?
Shen Long: Yes, I know about it. your wish to ask whether it's real or not?
Goku: No, no, no, no, no! If you do know, could you bring it here?
Shen Long: I cannot. It doesn't exist. Super Saiyan God is a temporary god created by the Saiyans.
Goku: What do you mean by that?
Shen Long: You have a lot of questions. What exactly is your wish?

Hitsugaya: Kuchiki and Kuchiki aren't here.
Ikkaku: Can you refer to them by first names, sir? You're confusing us.

Shinigami: You know nothing about my suffering!
Gintoki: I can pretty much guess. You couldn't learn Bankai or something, right?

Konata: I went to Asakusa the other day.
Kagami: Oh? When did you go?
Konata: Trains in the winter make you drowsy, you know?
Kagami: She slept past her destination?!
Tsukasa: Wait... But isn't that in the opposite direction?
Konata: Apparently, I slept too long, so it doubled back from the final stop, and I slept past my station again. And when I came to, it was Asakusa.

Gintoki Sakata: When are they going to run the next Hanger x Hanger? Keeping me in suspense like that! They say "we'll be right back".

Hajime Obi: The name's Obi Hajime! If that's a pain to say, call me Obi-One!

Gintoki: Scary... Super scary!
Hasegawa: What part of that story made you freak out?!
Gintoki: Toei Animation's gonna kill us!

Ane: What's the big deal about getting your butt groped? Do you know why there are two halves to your butt? It's so that you won't mind if someone touches one half.

Kotaro Katsura: It's not rap, it's Katsurap, yo.

Mutta Nanba: It would have been faster to crunch the numbers in my head! My mental abacus was too realistic! The beads kept sliding around because I was running!

Lee: To think that our Guy Sensei is the Hokage!
Gai: Insolent fool! I am no longer Guy Sensei. I'm the Guykage!

Bulma: There's no way I'm going by myself, okay? Someone come with me!
Turtle Hermit: Two months round trip, huh? All right, I guess I've got no choice but to go with you.
Bulma: That will just add unnecessary danger!

Gintoki Sakata: I've been reading Jump for twenty years. So I'll teach you about friendship, diligence and victory.

Gintoki Sakata: Men can get by with knowledge of the Sengoku era alone! Before that, it was just mostly-gorillas running around with spears in hand.

Konata: Well, even though it's vacation, I'm going to see our teacher almost every day anyway.
Kagami: Why? You have summer classes or something?
Konata: We form parties in our net game and stuff. Our teacher is a wiz and I'm a tank, so when we pair up and I pull stuff, it's pretty good in terms of both xp and money. Though I'm always the busy one, and all our teacher does is click on one of the AoE skills. The other day, I pulled a ton of mobs only to find our teacher had fallen asleep at the keyboard, and it took me all day to earn my death penalty back...

Gintoki Sakata: Overcoming the obstacle of these annoying seeds to eat the watermelon is the mini-drama, of sorts, that gives its flavor a sense of urgency and makes it even more delicious. Basically, when you eat a watermelon, you eat not the fruit, but the drama it creates.

Komatsu: N-No way... The legendary chef... Setsuno-sama...
Setsuno: Hey, now. There's no need to attach "sama". Call me Setsunon.
Komatsu: S-She has such strong friendly affinity. No, I can't talk like I'm classmates with a Human National Treasure...
Setsuno: Who're classmates?! Don't act so familiar!

Toshiro Hijikata: If there's something stuck to the bowl... you know how you unconsciously aim at it to shoot it off? We'll use that psychology and make it so they'll aim into the urinal.

Supreme Kai: It's the power of love. The power of Krillin and No. 18's love won! It's truly your Big Amour! You two are so lovey-dovey I'm jealous! How sweet!
No. 18: I'll kill you.
Supreme Kai: I'm sorry. I got carried away.

Myōga: How unusual for Inuyasha to contemplate about something.

Elizabeth: Man, look at you all whining. That's why you're One Piece Quarter. Actually, it took four years to make 1/4 the amount. So if you want to be number one, you'll have to spend sixteen years preparing.

Beerus: Man, you're useless.
Shen Long: Forgive me... Have you any other wish?
Beerus: Scram. That's my wish.

Ichigo: How many sets of a hundred pushups are you gonna make me do?!
Kūgo: That was only your fourteenth set. ... Why don't you do one more set to match your name?
Ichigo: You had to say that! I hate those kinds of puns!
Kūgo: Liar. I know you wear a T-shirt that says "15" on it.

Miyuki Takara: Come to think of it, when I went to an amusement park the other day, I had thought I was lining up for one of the rides, when I actually was in line for the restroom.